Farm Life is Always Interesting

To make up for making everyone cry earlier today.....We hear a crackle and big loud boom then we find this in the backyard.

No puppies nor humans were hurt during this event... but considering my past with chainsaws, a human might be hurt in the future.

This is a Very Sad Read, but So True...

I found this on Reddit yesterday. I did not write this, but I had to share because it speaks such truth about our little guys and girls. I wanted to share because there might be a day you need to read this, or that day has already passed and you need a reminder.

Some of you, particularly those who think they have recently lost a dog to “death”, don’t really understand this. I’ve had no desire to explain, but won’t be around forever and must.
Dogs never die. They don’t know how to. They get tired, and very old, and their bones hurt. Of course they don’t die. If they did they would not want to always go for a walk, even long after their old bones say:” No, no, not a good idea. Let’s not go for a walk.” Nope, dogs always want to go for a walk. They might get one step before their aging tendons collapse them into a heap on the floor, but that’s what dogs are. They walk.
It’s not that they dislike your company. On the contrary, a walk with you is all there is. Their boss, and the cacaphonic symphony of odor that the world is. Cat poop, another dog’s mark, a rotting chicken bone ( exultation), and you. That’s what makes their world perfect, and in a perfect world death has no place.
However, dogs get very very sleepy. That’s the thing, you see. They don’t teach you that at the fancy university where they explain about quarks, gluons, and Keynesian economics. They know so much they forget that dogs never die. It’s a shame, really. Dogs have so much to offer and people just talk a lot.
When you think your dog has died, it has just fallen asleep in your heart. And by the way, it is wagging it’s tail madly, you see, and that’s why your chest hurts so much and you cry all the time. Who would not cry with a happy dog wagging its tail in their chest. Ouch! Wap wap wap wap wap, that hurts. But they only wag when they wake up. That’s when they say: “Thanks Boss! Thanks for a warm place to sleep and always next to your heart, the best place.”
When they first fall asleep, they wake up all the time, and that’s why, of course, you cry all the time. Wap, wap, wap. After a while they sleep more. (remember, a dog while is not a human while. You take your dog for walk, it’s a day full of adventure in an hour. Then you come home and it’s a week, well one of your days, but a week, really, before the dog gets another walk. No WONDER they love walks.)
Anyway, like I was saying, they fall asleep in your heart, and when they wake up, they wag their tail. After a few dog years, they sleep for longer naps, and you would too. They were a GOOD DOG all their life, and you both know it. It gets tiring being a good dog all the time, particularly when you get old and your bones hurt and you fall on your face and don’t want to go outside to pee when it is raining but do anyway, because you are a good dog. So understand, after they have been sleeping in your heart, they will sleep longer and longer.
But don’t get fooled. They are not “dead.” There’s no such thing, really. They are sleeping in your heart, and they will wake up, usually when you’re not expecting it. It’s just who they are.
I feel sorry for people who don’t have dogs sleeping in their heart. You’ve missed so much. Excuse me, I have to go cry now.

Like Frankie & Ernie Said, "Baby, It's Cold Outside...."

We are expecting 6 inches of snow today. Yay. :/ So I ran out and did a quick shop at Wal-mart. All I have to say is TGFFWD (Thank God For Front Wheel Drive). I saw so many rear-wheeled drive cars stuck along my way. I grew up in the mountains. I know how to drive in the snow. I just don't like driving here because so many do not know how to drive in the rain, let alone snow. So I plan to snuggle in, read a book, watch a movie, drink some hot cocoa, and watch the snow fall.... and wash the rug in the bathroom as the dogs have decided that is preferable to going out in the snow. :/

So, here is my home state, Kentucky, winter white covered, a dachshund owner's nightmare...

Dachshund Doritos Ad for the Super Bowl

They have found the key to selling things... just get a dachshund spokesdog.

Enjoy!

Wintery, Wet, We-Hate-Snow Wednesday

We ended up with 4 inches of snow. And this morning it was -5F air temps... who knows what the windchill was.  All we have to say is "Come on Spring!!"

PS Thanks for the messages of love and support. I am a huge idiot. I made bad decisions. I trusted people I shouldn't have trusted. I did things that are completely out of character. I don't love me a lot right now, so I am holding on to all your nice words, and three wiggly, wet, cold lumps of fur, until I feel better about myself again. <3 br="">

What a Difference a Day Makes...

Glad we enjoyed yesterday, cause today stinks.

It's a Beautiful Day! Perfect for a....

Walk! :) Honestly, I cannot believe it is still 'winter' with all this sunshine and things starting to be more green than brown.  But every time I take a look my calendar still says "January". I'm not sure what is going on with the climate, but I'm not about to pass up an opportunity to take a long walk with my three best friends.

Happy Birthday, Newby!!

Can you believe we've had this little love bug in our family for almost 2 years now? I know that my life has been made infinitely better by his wiggly, snuggly, sweet goodness. Last night we had a little birthday celebration for Newby. Reed is leaving for Gatlinburg this morning so he won't be at home to celebrate with Newby on his real birthday. So a plate full of chicken, grilled to perfection, and a bunch of stuffies, which were immediately destuffed, made for a great birthday for our newest little guy.

Happy Birthday, Newby-doo!

My Goal....

It's Cold Enough to Share

Must be pretty cold for Milo to allow Newby to rest his noggin on him and his heating pad.

Btw, I'm ok. Just not chatty right now. Ok? Thanks for all the check ins.

It's Tuesday...

and we're still not getting out of bed.

The Kind of Day We are Having

It's a cold, gray, and an exhaustively slow day. So I am going to stay in bed, snuggled up warmly, though not as warmly as Newby, and watch Sherlock. Happy Monday.

Happy? Not Really... but I'm Breathing

My girlfriend told me the other day to concentrate on breathing. So today I am concentrating on breathing in and out, and drinking a Moka Josie made from ingredients from Lexington Tea and Coffee. Does it make me happy? Not really, but it's so hot I don't have to remember breathing... I need the cool Kentucky air to make my burnt tongue feel better.

So I Go to the Doctor...

I went to the doctor today. First appointment of the day. I told her, without a few thousand tears, what was going on with me. And....

She gave me a medicine and said "Well, if you want to see a therapist, just check with your insurance about what they cover, but remember it's a new year, time for change" or something along that lines. Basically "here is a pill, buck up little camper."

My problems can't be fixed with a pill. Though they can help me not be so desperate.

My problems can't be fixed with the start of a new year. Though it can give me an opportunity to make amends.

My problems can't be fixed with change... if I don't know what I am changing.

I keep remembering something from West Wing, my favorite TV Show ever.

 What I need is that friend who can help lead me out. But I'm afraid the friend that I depended on, the one I loved, the only one who I could and did count on, was the one I hurt the most in all of this.

I'm afraid I'm going to be in this hole forever, because no one knows the way out.

2014

A lot of you mentioned the new year and the optimism that a new start would and could happen. It's important to start a new year with the right attitude. Hell, it's important to start each day with the right attitude. This is where I'm struggling right now.

My feelings shuffle between anger to confusion to bargaining to despondency to nothing at all. I'm pretty much sure those are all the signs of grief. I guess it's normal. Any change or loss of any kind affects the mood, the spirit.

My best friend sent me a picture yesterday. Did it change my mood? Make me cry less? Change my attitude? Not really in the way she intended, I guess. I was actually amazed I got it at all. You see with Verizon I rarely could access my voice mail or receive picture messages until I got into town. Christmas day Reed and I changed to Sprint because Verizon was being a pain.

So here I lie in bed, crying, and I get a message... and it's a picture. I didn't look at the picture, more than just the thumbnail, for a while. I simply looked at the screen dumbfounded. I was floored that a simple change in plans would cause my phone to work like everyone else.

A change in plans... that is what I need to just deal for the next little bit. I don't think I can deal with this alone. This is my normal MO. I get upset, hurt, mad, and I cut myself off from everyone. Then I make poor decisions because I am listening to a heart full of pain with a brain lonely for attention. I think I need help. I think instead of being an island I need someone helping me. If even, for today, in the way her picture shows.

Happy New Year, happy new attitude, to me.